May 2013
46 posts
galaxys4:
hello students. welcome to my math class. we will be having a class trip this year, the first ever math field trip in history. it’s to hell. here we are
[SCREAMS FROM THE ROOFTOPS] PLATONIC RELATIONSHIPS MATTER TOO
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someonecalledmefamous:
mu5icliz:
germansam:
tokyosluts:
Sleeping is nice because youre not actually dead and youre not awake so its a win-win situation
It’s like being dead without the commitment.
an open relationship with death
death with benefits
psilentasincjelli:
If I ever tell you I’m going to sleep and then you see me posting or liking things online for about an hour immediately after that, I promise I wasn’t lying to you, I’m just bad at going to sleep and it is usually a long process that begins with disengaging from any sort of immediate contact with people (chats, for example) and ends when everything on my screen is blurry and...
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A woman is not written in braille, you don’t have to touch her to know her.
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Reblog if convenient.
allonsy221b:
heresyourhost:
If inconvenient, reblog anyway.
Could be dangerous
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sardonicheight:
[[seductively does nothing to indicate I’m attracted to you]]
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gothlolita:
im Sorry but you two cant get the marriage. the bible said Adam and Eve not matthew and ashley. come back when youve legally changed your names
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the-adequate-gatsby:
the-adequate-gatsby:
the-adequate-gatsby:
My sister keeps asking me if I want to go see The Great Cosby with her and I don’t have it in my heart to correct her.
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3ridan:
do you ever look around at the big crowds of people around you and realize everyone has a story and memories and family and troubles and achievements and a first kiss and a broken heart but you’ll never know any of it and every human life is really intricate and expansive but oh they’ve walked into a shop and you’ll never see them again and you’ll never know just what they were...
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someone could murder me right now and i would be like
ok
is this comfortable 4 u
is there any way i can improve yr murdering experience
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mightyenarc:
when your friends are all making angsty and sad posts all over your dashboard and you’re helpless to do anything to help
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starllex:
What presents girls say they want
jewelry
clothes
perfume
money
What presents girls REALLY want
the bill of rights
a muscular rat
the letter o
a brick
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ptosistwitcheye asked: weh you didnt come give me a hug i have the sads
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rneerkat:
girls hit on me AND boys hit on me. i explode. i am a piñata
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queer-punk:
Don’t make jokes about rape
Don’t make jokes about cutting
Don’t make jokes about eating disorders
Don’t make jokes about suicide
Don’t make jokes about mental illness
It’s not funny
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why did i stay out until 12:45 on a fucking Tuesday night
because i hate myself, that’s why
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themongooseandthesnake:
“yeah im a lesbian trapped inside a man’s body” the cishet male laughs as he highfives one of his dudebros. suddenly he gives off a look of pure terror and a piercing shriek as his skin is ripped apart, much to the horror of his crew. his skin falls to the floor and a woman is left standing where he once was. “FINALLY” she roars, kicking one of the dudebros in the dick...
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ptosistwitcheye asked: What kind of job are you thinking about getting? Haha no I'm not surviving at all, but at least I'm trying!
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kamukuraizuru:
Tag ur great gatsby spoilers it’s only been out for niNETY YEARS
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I asked all of the gay male students in the room to raise their hand if in the...
– Gay Men’s Sexism and Women’s Bodies by Yolo Akili (via plightofthepretty)
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today I discovered that children’s Advil tastes like a mixture of blue raspberry flavoring and betrayal
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being genderqueer sucks.
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katelovesliterature asked: I can't wait to see you soon so we can amble madly all over the town ;)
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bombliate:
official-honeybooboo:
bombliate:
dave-vriska:
bombliate:
[JUDGE VOICE] did u do the thing
[DEFENDANT VOICE] no
[JUDGE VOICE] i don’t believe u
[WITNESS VOICE] he did the thing
[JUDGE VOICE] ooooooh i knew it
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ptosistwitcheye asked: Good luck on your AP's and I hope you're senior internship is going well and you have a pretty face and yes bye.
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ptosistwitcheye asked: i know you made a post about just no but it reminded me to 1. ask how your softball games went and 2. tell you that you have super amazing awesome eyes okay bye
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can everyone just not
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piercelopez:
there are two types of crushes:
1. a casual crush, you look at them and you’re like “wow you’re pretty cute i’d like to get to know you better”
2. absolutely, undeniably head over heels oh my god are you fucking kidding me you are perfect wow i’m literally going to rethink every conversation we’ve ever had for the next 9 hours of my life please love me
there is no in between
April 2013
26 posts
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